Life is easy... (Is it?)

Lately, I've been in quite a frenzy! I guess you could call it a 'life frenzy'. Everything has just been crazy, I have been overly self-critical and have been thinking about everything.

One thing which entered my mind is that a person just assumes that life is easy, because billions of people do life everyday, but what hardly anybody discusses is how difficult it is to do life.

Even, if you lived in your own world and stayed at home you would come across challenges like what you would eat. How you would get food. How you would cook the food. And you would also have to take care of bodily functions. That is the total minimum you have to do and it is already a lot.

Then you have to think about quality of life. Your body takes a lot of maintenance: hair, makeup, clothing, weight, overall appearance. That is a lot to think about. Then you have relationships: relationships with friends, family, boyfriend, girlfriend, husbands, wives, cousins etc. They all take a lot of work otherwise they would be non-existent.

Another thing is work. You go to school, university, work and you have to put in a lot of effort to succeed otherwise you find yourself being fired or kicked out.

Everything else is optional in life, but the things I have mentioned is just the total minimum which most people do. And the whole point is that I think that the amount of effort you have to put in to do life is totally under-estimated... or at least most people make out that it is.

I'm not saying that it isn't worth it. It totally is. The more you put in, the more you get out and it is a journey where you have your up hills and down hills and even your cruises, but it just occurred to me how much work just trying to live is. You would think that by default you would just be able to stay alive, but how untrue this is!

Make sure you live life how you want to!

Now, onto shower number a trillion (just daily maintenance!)

I don't think I will be getting my O.W.L.S...

For the past week, my life has been submerged in work: Studying for exams. Today was my first one. After a few days of stressing about it and banging my head against a very hard table, I woke up this morning with rays of motivation beaming from me. I was adamant that I was going to do okay in this exam, or so I thought...

In reality:

I woke up without beaming rays of motivation but more of dripping drops of nervousness. Opened my curtains to reveal a snowy horizon, I wasn't sure if this was a sign to come of the frosty reception of the exam paper.

I studied, with panic, for the last few hours I had. Confident I was going to do okay.

Half way through the exam, I wanted to vomit and cry simultaneously whilst punching myself. I feel like Prof. Snape would have written a kinder paper for Harry.

Not a great paper, however, now as I sit with a warm, comforting cup of tea to end the day, it still seems like I've done at least one good thing today!

I study Computer Science, is this something that I feel like pursuing any further? Not anymore! After this exam, I might not even be allowed to.

Life is weird. It takes you on a crazy ride with you steering using decisions. The outcome is unknown. The destination is not the goal. The fun is in the wonder.

But, let's just say: Based on this paper... I don't think I will be getting my computing O.W.L.S!